Your dating guide com

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Zan: That’s the thing that makes dating different in your 30s, maybe.

You get to this place where maybe you do need to make a decision about if you want to be in a partnership and maybe eventually get pregnant.

If being in a relationship was as important to me as my job, I would carve time out for it the way I carve time out for exercise, the way I carve time out for my friends.

That’s a completely valid thing to do if that's your decision.

We have seen a shift in people's habits and beliefs.

Current events and changes in technology may require you to update your dating style from years ago.

That’s how I feel about dating: If it happens, great, and if it doesn’t, that’s fine too.

Glynnis: When I'm traveling, I get on Tinder or whatever the dating app in Europe is and make dates with people.

It’s a fun way to get to know a new city, partly because it's a lot less pressure when you're in another place.

It was a friend of a friend who I'd met at a dinner—it was one of those things where it's like, ? But I just see the big picture, and how much work that would take, and I don't want to take that energy and put it toward this. Not only that, I have some fairly time-intensive hobbies that I care about, and beyond So I go through these phases where I'm like, I'm gonna go on the apps and I'm gonna go on some dates. It's whatever it is, five or six hours, all told. So one of the things that I'm working on is recognizing that I've been the arbiter of my own time since I graduated from college, so for like a decade now. I'm allowed to say, I don't like doing this, and I don't want to! At a certain age, when a lot of your friends have paired off and your social interactions don't bump you up against a variety of other people, you do have to make the decision to date.

Zan: I sometimes have conversations with people where they're like, "If you want to get married, you have to date like it's your job." And like... The thing is that that decision gets put up against all the other decisions you're making about how you want to spend your time.

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